My last blog post argued the merits of having ego present in jiujitsu, while trying to abandon pride. Basically, I said ego is good for jiujitsu because it helps regulate internal extremes, such as your primitive and overly cautious sides.
While rolling yesterday, a visitor from another gym stopped by. While asking me to roll, he said something that triggered my primitive side. My usually calm, collected self got a little heated, and my ego took a back seat. Pride stepped in to the Killer J’s driver seat, and I accelerated in to the guy with sadistic enthusiasm. At the time, it felt great.
If you know me personally, you know that me losing my cool is pretty uncharacteristic of me. It is even more rare that I act on that emotion. Looking back on it, I was being a dick. The guy probably didn’t mean any harm with his words, and even if he did, I know better than to let my pride dictate my actions. I’ll make sure my ego is tuned up and alert next time I’m on the mat.