“Hey,” he says in a hushed tone, beckoning you closer with a subtle head nod. You oblige. Again, he starts in “Hey, so what do you think of this whole Bin Laden deal?” You know where this is going, so you offer up a hurried, yet generic patriotic reply, to which your met with a simultaneously condescending and knowing smirk. He retorts with, “Wanna know what’s really going on?” “No,” you think silently, yet begrudgingly resign yourself to the tin-foil hat spawned ideas emanating form his perpetually paranoid pate.
You’ll spend the next half hour tuning in and out of a story artlessly weaving the so-called lie about Osama’s death being connected to government inspired fake moon landings, Jay-Z and Rihanna’s connection to the illuminati ran White House, and how JFK’s true assassin definitely spearheaded the government’s obvious involvement in masterminding 9/11 so the North American Union could seize ultimate control of the black market blood diamond trade.
Follow all that? Of course not, unless you are that guy. Now, if you are that guy then you have immediately dismissed Killer J as either “one of them” or one of the many “easily duped, bleating sheeple.” Let me clear things up for your feeble mind, I’m “one of them” and I’m coming for you. Close your curtains and lock your doors, you kooky freak. Better yet, start a cult, lock your followers and yourself inside some fortress, and never come out. Just please quit looking for a story that simply isn’t there. Thank you for your time. 🙂