Post-Deadlift Elation Anguish Disorder

Post Deadlift Elation Anguish Disorder (P-DEAD), is characterized by a sudden onset of physical pain, regret, and paradoxically, elation, after a brutal session of deadlifts.  P-DEAD can be diagnosed if the sufferer meets the following criteria:

Deadlifts: Individual must have actually done deadlifts within 24 hours of symptom onset.

Elation: Individual must maintain a giddy, euphoric nature despite interminable physical pain for 18 out of 24 hours per day.

Anguish: Individual’s pain level must severely limit movement, cause facial grimacing during the lightest of tasks, and must also drive the individual in to a frenzied search for pain relieving medication for 18 out of 24 hours per day.

Disorder: Individual’s social and occupational life must be compromised significantly for up to, but no more than five days after the onset of symptoms.

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4 thoughts on “Post-Deadlift Elation Anguish Disorder

  1. P-Dead on a weekly basis is the only way to go!! It’s love hate relationship, and it hurts so good. Getting up from the couch, changing the channel, steering your car, and sitting to eat dinner become arduous tasks!

  2. I think I may have suffered from this a few times. Is there a chronic diagnosis for such a disorder? How about when you do them with poor posture and it feels like somebody shoved a razor-blade covered dildo into your f@#king back? That must be P-DEAD NOS??? All I know is rather than being birthed like a normal child, Jeff instead decided to punch his way out of his mother’s womb. Hence the term “C-section.” Keep it up DragonEagle!

Reply to Killer J!

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